How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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