Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
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