i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
