I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
