How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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