ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
