I want to have your abortion
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize