If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize