I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
