yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
