Sry I called you an 8
I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
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