My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
and you fell through a lawn chair
Randomize
