But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize