on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
My dick has a subreddit
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
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