would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
