Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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