my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
