Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
