It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
She's the barista slut.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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