hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Randomize
