Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
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