just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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