I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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