K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
