This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
Randomize
