alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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