I heard we made out
If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Randomize