The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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