She went from zero to smokin in five shots
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
