at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
