he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
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