I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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