Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
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