Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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