yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
