FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Randomize
