I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Randomize
