He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
He uses pillows to masturbate.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize