I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Randomize
