so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Randomize
