clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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