Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
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