Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Randomize
