she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize