We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
