i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
i out mim tonsoeep
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
