Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Holy shit dude........stairs
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