The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Randomize
