Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
