We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize